What Do You Mean, Life Isn't Fair?

Today,most often we try to shield our kids from disappointments and failures. Just speak to a parent of pre-primary or primary school kids and they will tell you how much more onerous it has become to make sure that no kids is disappointed in any way. If you bring a Valentine's card, you must bring one for the entire class. If you pass out invitations to a birthday party at school, you need to invite everyone. Every kid at the end of the term receives an award or a trophy, regardless of whether it states 'Shows Promise' or  'Most Beautiful Smile'! Seriously??

While I am a great proponent of building self-esteem in kids at a very early age, and the fact that I would hate to see disappointment on any child's face, I have realised that this kind of behaviour, unfortunately doesn't prepare them very well for real life when they become adults.

I can vividly remember whining to my Mum; " That's not fair, she's got a new dress and I don't!"And true to form, my Mum responded, "Well, get used to it. Life isn't fair!"
Ain't that the truth!

Believe me, I really wish it were! I wish that my children didn't have to lose their Dad at such young ages, or their grandparents within 3 years of each other, and that everyone in the world had enough to eat, all of the time, and that no one was ever disappointed or scared or sick or sad. I truly wish that with all of my heart.

But unfortunately, that's not the way the world works. The world we live in rewards hard work and perseverance, followed by more hard work and more perseverance, followed by (you guessed it...), more hard work and perseverance! To top off all the hard work and prseverance, the world also expects you to keep your emotions in check, stay positive and ride out the challenges. Whew! It's no wonder I'm so exhausted at the end of the day!

But I guess if there is anything that we should teach our kids is that;

• Life is unfair, deal with it!
• You always have a choice, its the repercussions that you need to take into account
• Keep your emotions in check, especially those ones that make you jealous, envious and mean
• Work hard at being positive (it certainly isn't easy!), its the only thing that makes every morning a pleasure to wake up to
• And if you really want to stack the deck in your favor, you need to throw in a little planning and strategizing along the way.

That is the path to success, and of course what we all want for our children.

 

Ed: I would love to receive your comments...positive and negative :-)